In which our intrepid hero looks for love in all the wrong places.

Another story from the annals of pulp biology, this time from

The insertion of human stem cells into monkey brains runs a “real risk” of altering the animals’ abilities in ways that might make them more like us, scientists said today. […]

The scientists admit they don’t even know what really separates humans from our closest relatives […]

All I can say is, find me a cat that looks even remotely like Fairuza Balk, and I’ll inject the stem cells into her myself.

(Unforgettable cinema experience: watching a first-day screening of The Island of Dr Moreau, and the entire audience starts loudly chanting, “Fuck the cat! Fuck the cat!” That’s not something that happens every day.)